don’t be dead
LOTR/Hobbit fans: if you’re not familiar with Martin Freeman, then you need to be prepared. He’s going to victimize you next.
Martin Freeman’s Face is a tear-jerking menace. The BBC has allowed it to maraud uncontrolled, and thanks to their lackadaisical management, it has now been transmitted to New Zealand, the US, and is becoming a worldwide danger.
Be alert for the early warning signs of Martin Freeman’s Face:
- happiness
- respect and astonishment for how well he can act through expression alone
- bewilderment that a 40-something man can have such large eyes and cute button nose
- a feeling similar to having a fuzzy kitten in your lap while watching him play a role
- hobbits
While at first Martin Freeman’s Face can appear to be a benign, even beneficial experience, IT WILL TURN AGAINST YOU. Documentary evidence is above. An immediate warning sign is the appearance of additional forehead wrinkles. When additional forehead wrinkles appear, it may be (but is not always) a sign of impending Face Crumple, which can lead to emotional devastation in the viewer. No known cure for Martin Freeman Face Crumple exists, and viewers are often caught unprepared without enough hankies or pictures of adorable baby animals to mend their broken hearts.
Martin Freeman Face Crumple emergency toolkit:
This has been a public service announcement, sponsored by Victims of Martin Freeman’s Face.