He’s completely untrustworthy.
I feel pretty much like this! Time to do a longer post on the subject, I think.
I’d agree if I were only interested in reading and writing healthy bdsm dynamics.
When in actuality I’m far more interested in the unhinged version of them, the one that doesn’t get things right because there’s a twisted charm to the dimorphic desire of a dom who has the compulsion to own, but not the knowledge, the skill or the restraint to be careful.
So yeah, it really, really works for me.
I’m in the same mind as Cranberryloops on this one. She just translated my thoughts far more eloquently than I could have done. This particular dynamic is the one I tend to explore and write about. 😀
He isn’t especially trustworthy, no, but I absolutely believe he swings that way. Or, no, I’m not really talking about BDSM dom. I’m just talking about good old-fashioned abusiveness.
Sherlock is canonically abusive. We’ve seen how he likes to be in control, how he enjoys dominating any context he’s put in. We’ve seen how obsessive he is about John, following him everywhere, interfering with his dates, seemingly eking out every secret John’s got from his head but freely lying and hiding things about his own goings-on. And then there’s Baskerville. And of course his casual verbal abuse of everybody who gets near him—even the people he’s willing to die for. (Think about it; how well would YOU get on with somebody who insulted you and everyone you know the way he does? How long before that really started doing some mental damage to you?)
It may also be worth noting that from what I’ve seen, my characterization of Sherlock tends to differ from most peoples’. I see a lot of stories where he’s not as in control as he likes to think, where he has no real idea what he’s doing, or he’s an unreliable observer of his own life, or he spends his time walking the fine line between brilliance and total meltdown. I don’t really see that in him. I think he really is in control of himself, his faculties, and most situations he gets himself into, and about 95% on target when it comes to his observations and deductions and manipulations and schemes. (Mind you, that 5% can be a killer.) I see him being untrustworthy because he willfully does things to people without their consent.
So…no, I don’t think it’s healthy. It’s certainly not any relationship I’d want to be in. And if you introduce BDSM elements into a dynamic, then you mostly just get more of that dynamic, possibly with props. But it’s what we’re given, and I’m perennially interested in exploring it. Does Sherlock realize what he’s doing? Why does John seem so fine with it? Is it functional, or dysfunctional? If it’s functional (as the show seems to want us to believe, and as many of us in our S/J-shipping hearts hope and wish), then good lord, how? If dysfunctional (which frankly seems more reasonable), then what is the eventual outcome? Is there a way to fix it? Would John ever leave? When Sherlock comes back after Reichenbach, has two years to think and re-establish context perhaps given him a different outlook on this? (That’s a post-Hiatus story I’ve never seen, by the way—“Hell, no, I’m not coming back to you, you crazy abusive bastard. What was I ever thinking?!”)