Apparently the discussions from yesterday have unrolled into anarchy in Sherlock fandom today. I just want to reiterate that I have the best followers ever. I’m seeing a lot of hurt feelings from good people coming across my dash (*hugs* and/or warm thoughts to all of you who’ve been upset) but no viciousness or attacking.
Oh my dears, you are all such good, giving people, I want to bundle you up and whisk you off to a warm, blanket-lined corner of fandom where we could while away the hours happily together while everybody calms down and catches their breath.
For now, the best I can do is to remind you that there are still happy, welcoming, non-frothing fans out there. And that some people are just frothing because they, too, feel hurt today.
But I feel that it’s important to address the topic of shame. THIS is why I’m taking this debate seriously. I’ve seen too many people bringing up their sense of shame for me to let this go by. Shame is a tool for reinforcing social harmony that can too easily be made into a weapon to silence voices of dissent and diversity. It’s such a natural-feeling, easily internalized thing that people often (as many of us know) don’t realize when they’re being attacked, or even when they’re attacking.
This conversation started with Ian Hallard’s and Amanda Abbington’s tweets, which ran along the lines of (I’m paraphrasing here) ‘Poor fans, what did they think was going to happen?’ Personally I don’t think they meant to sound condescending, mocking, or dismissive, but to quite a few people, they came off that way. They’re not mean people. I don’t think they probably meant to hurt anybody. But if you analyze their words and the meaning behind them, then yes, what we’ve got here is social shaming at work. ”Silly fans for holding an opinion counter to the status quo.”
But I’m not ashamed. Guys, I’m here to tell you that there’s nothing shameful in developing your own interpretation of a text, especially when you can point to things in the text that support it. There’s nothing shameful in subversive readings. Maybe your own particular reading will stand up in the court of critical analysis, and maybe it won’t. But when people speak against you, listen for whether you hear valid criticisms or just the voice of the status quo. If it’s the latter, then be PROUD you’re questioning it. Be PROUD you’re not just lying down and accepting The Way Things Are.
And when you make an argument or hold a belief, maybe you phrase it well or maybe you don’t, but there’s no shame falling on you if your argument is misunderstood and then criticized for flaws or problems it doesn’t actually have. So many people—including people affiliated with the show—seem to be coming at each other from wrong angles, engaging in different conversations entirely. Before you let somebody’s point or rebuttal sink straight to your heart, do your best to pause and ask yourself if they’re even talking about the same thing you are. In this case, I’m seeing a vast amount of conflation of ‘committed relationship’ with ‘slash relationship’—including from people affiliated with the show—and they are not in fact the same thing and not the same conversation.
And there’s not even anything shameful with feeling hurt because you feel your favorite theory or interpretation of your story has been voided. You know what? This is a story. This is entertainment. We engage with our favorite shows and books and games on the level of play, and if a childish part of us wants to kick up its heels and say, “This isn’t fair! This isn’t how I wanted the story to go!” then you know what? There’s nothing wrong with that. Most of us spend the vast majority of our lives struggling to be responsible adults. In playtime, we’re allowed to give that child-voice some time to speak. The only thing that matters is that you try not to let it lash out and hurt other people.
And as for fandom and our favorite shows: there’s also no shame in venting, if it helps you feel better, just so long as you try not to let your venting hurt other people. I hope you can also find some consolation and patience in remembering that what we see now isn’t the whole story. We may like the elements we’ve seen, or we may not, but we don’t know yet what the full final picture will look like. The story doesn’t lie in the facts; it lies in what the characters make of the facts.
And finally: there’s no shame in taking off for a couple of days and finding something else to do till the wank blows over. Hugs and affection to all of you, and if any of you want to talk, my ask box is open!