Imagine this for a minute
Everytime I see this post I get mixed feelings. I do love Harry Potter and Constantine, but would they work together? And you know what, maybe they would. Now here me out:
Imagine Dumbledore being like “this is THE John Constantine– a powerful mage from a long line of famous wizards and many victories against the Dark Arts, also known as the Laughing Magician” and everyone (even Minerva) being impressed. Imagine this as his chocolate frog card description. John just snorts at that. He probably smokes on class but takes points from students if they are caught with cigarettes (also he confiscates it for obvious reasons). Of course he refuses capes and just uses the tie + trenchcoat combo. He’s always late cause BLOODY STAIRS can’t decide where they are leading to. Some ladies (and one guy) in the moving paintings scream as he passes “you!! I thought we had something special!!” while he frankly ignores them. He drinks with Hagrid in the cabin and gets him all kinds of illegal pets cause John likes the big ol’ bloke that much. Snape is convinced Constantine is there to steal something (he probably is) or have blackmailed Dumbledore (he probably did) but can’t seem to prove anything. He introduces professor Sprout to the magic of marijuana and insists she’s got to meet this great mate of his, Swamp Thing (who is NOT amused when he gets Pomona’s letters). He and Firenze go way back but nobody knows the full story, only that the centaur owes John one. Sybill always makes scary statements about him as “you killed your best friend’s mother!” but nobody really pays attention to her (even though it’s true). In fact Minerva is the first one to say “she chooses one of us to accuse of murder every year, if you go to jail just don’t let it keep you from grading those essays” in a mocking tone. John of course I can fly I just don’t WANT to Constantine enjoys Quidditch but is terrified of getting on one of those brooms. Most of his classes are just him telling the kids about his own tales and teaching very useful stuff like how to turn holy water into beer. He curses a lot. He is too lazy to give homework and grant points to students who can prank the staff. Extra points if it’s Filch (cause John hates him), Snape (cause he hates John) or Binns (cause the guy never realizes he’s being pranked which makes nearly impossible for anyone to do it). Dumbledore probably finds all this very amusing.
There used to be an incredible although abandoned crossover… Hang on, here it is.
Hellblazer: Hogwarts, by Camwyn
from Tumblr http://ift.tt/1VCMXTB