When I was a kid, we had a garden at my mom’s house.  One year, the cucumber plant went completely batfuck.

By August our neighbors were all avoiding us because they knew if we saw them we’d try to give them more cucumbers.  My sister learned how to can and pickle in self-defense.  THESE CUCUMBERS WERE THE SIZE OF MY ARM.  THEY WERE SO BIG AND THERE WERE SO MANY.

And do you know.  Every time I read an omegaverse fic, somewhere in my head I think, “That dick’d be about the size of one of those cucumbers…”

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