We had an ask this morning that requested a post to go more in-depth about the possibility of having a sex drive while still being asexual. Here it is!
I immediately referenced my handy copy of The Invisible Orientation by Julie Sondra Decker. Starting on page 27, for anyone who wants to refer to their own copy, is a section titled Libido and Masturbation. This is where I found the following:
“The main issue is to remember that sexual arousal, sex drive, and sexual attraction are different things. Sexual arousal suggests a physiological response; sex drive suggests a desire to respond to arousal or pursue sex; and sexual attraction suggests an experience of finding someone sexually appealing. Asexual people are defined as asexual because other people aren’t sexually attractive in their minds (or the possibility of sex with other people isn’t particularly compelling). That does not mean that their genitals are incapable of arousal; it does not mean they’re necessarily unable to enjoy genital stimulation; it does not mean sex could not be physically pleasurable to them if they consented to have it.”
“The same way a gay man might in some cases enjoy a sexual favor from a woman without therefore being attracted to that woman, an asexual person might enjoy a masturbatory or sexual experience.”
“Asexuals reported significantly less desire for sex with a partner, lower sexual arousability, and lower sexual excitation but did not differ consistently from non-asexuals in their sexual inhibition scores or their desire to masturbate.”
“The presence of a sex drive, or a libido, or a desire to self-stimulate, does not disqualify someone from being asexual.”
“Many asexual people do describe having a low or nonexistent sex drive, though, and many don’t relate to the idea of needing release through orgasm or enjoying stimulation whatsoever.”But some do.
Here’s some other examples:Sex drive = “I could go for some sex right now.” Sexual attraction = “I would have sex with that particular person.”
Sex drive = reading or viewing sexual material, becoming aroused, and desiring “release.” Sexual attraction = feeling the desire to engage in sexual acts with a specific person.
Sex drive = finding a situation or experience sexually arousing. Sexual attraction = finding a person sexually arousing.So you see, the two are very different, and neither negates or requires the other.
At the end of the day, asexuals do not experience sexual attraction, but they may or may not have a sex drive.Let us know if you have further questions!
XOXO
Admin TurtleReblogging for the anon who asked about the difference between sexual attraction and arousal.
REBLOGGING AGAIN for the anon who asked about sensual attraction.
from Tumblr http://ift.tt/1JOu4H6