persephinae:

highpriestcrankypants:

Terry Pratchett was made an honorary Brownie and this pleases me to no end.

Not many men can say this,’ Terry says, proudly, ‘but as a result of The Wee Free Men I was made an honorary Brownie for writing a proper girl in a book. I’ve got a woggle and everything. No kidding.

‘Anyway, the Brownies wanted to kidnap someone famous and they decided on me because they liked Tiffany Aching. But they didn’t know how to go about it. And I thought, “All we need is a signing queue, two little girls and a yellow rubber chicken.” (I don’t know why it hasn’t been established before, but a yellow rubber chicken is the secret of all humour.)’

‘So, it’s all set up and I tell the two little Brownies, “You stand on one side of me and you on the other and just look at the camera, all sweet and innocent. Then without looking at me, one of you must raise my hat and the other has to hit me over the head with the rubber chicken. Then the first Brownie should place my hat back on my head as I slump down in the chair.”

‘The only problem was that people saw me apparently doing a signing and a massive queue built up. So then we had to explain to everyone that I wasn’t in fact doing a signing, but I would sign their books if they wouldn’t mind waiting until these two little girls had knocked me out. It was one of those surreal moments that you just treasure.’

“  (x)

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